I have done what I swore I wouldn't do with this blog...not update it! It's not for lack of effort though, I just haven't been inspired to write about anything in particular. But, for the sake of not letting this go by the wayside, here is an update on life:
The big change in the last few months has been Bree's triumphant return to school. She is going back to get a degree in Graphic Design. The long summer days of hanging out relaxing have come and gone and craziness has returned - though, not as crazy as it once was. Her schedule has been a big adjustment...for both of us; she is pretty jam-packed everyday and doing homework just about every night and all weekend. Needless to say, she is pretty overwhelmed, but also really excited and having fun.
Work has been going really, really well for me lately. It has been an exciting, stressful, tiring, challenging year and a half of growth for me and I am finally feeling like I am fully hitting my stride. I should really devote an entire entry to the first year at the first job...
Changes that Bree and I have made in our lives have been paying serious dividends. As past entries allude to, we have really been trying to prioritize our time and commitments and making some major shifts as a result - it has been making life much more enjoyable for both of us.
The family is coming into town in October, which I am REALLY excited about! We are going to do some man work, hiking, hanging, and maybe, just maybe - FOGO!
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Virginia is for Lovers
So, Bree and I went to northern VA a couple of weeks ago to visit our family. It was a really good trip and always really nice to see our families, but I couldn't help but laugh at us when we got back. You see, EVERY time we go that way we inevitably end up in deep conversation on the trip back about moving "home." The plan has always been to eventually migrate that way, but I can't help but find the humor in our recurring deep conversations.
Virginia and Tennessee are very different and I often find myself torn. On the one hand, I love Chattanooga. Our densest population of friends is here, I have a really good job here, we just bought an amazing house that we love, and Chattanooga is a cool city. On the other hand, northern VA is "home." Both of our families, whom we are very close to, are there, some of the people we are closest and most comfortable around are there, there are many diverse professional opportunities for both of us, and northern VA is very different than TN and dare I say, I generally like it better.
When I was growing up, I always wondered why whole families lived in the same town and promised myself I wouldn't let geography hold me back from the things I want to do in life. But as I get older, I find myself more and more reluctant to think about staying away from my extended family long-term. I have gone where the wind has taken me and successfully made a life for myself and now I find that I wish I weren't so far from "home."
I guess what I am ultimately saying is that I love where I live, I love my life here, but I really, really miss my family and the area they live in.
If you are reading this in TN, have no fear, we aren't going anywhere...for a while anyway. As I said before, we really do love it here. I wouldn't have taken a job here and we wouldn't have bought a house here if we didn't. I am just feeling a bit homesick.
Virginia and Tennessee are very different and I often find myself torn. On the one hand, I love Chattanooga. Our densest population of friends is here, I have a really good job here, we just bought an amazing house that we love, and Chattanooga is a cool city. On the other hand, northern VA is "home." Both of our families, whom we are very close to, are there, some of the people we are closest and most comfortable around are there, there are many diverse professional opportunities for both of us, and northern VA is very different than TN and dare I say, I generally like it better.
When I was growing up, I always wondered why whole families lived in the same town and promised myself I wouldn't let geography hold me back from the things I want to do in life. But as I get older, I find myself more and more reluctant to think about staying away from my extended family long-term. I have gone where the wind has taken me and successfully made a life for myself and now I find that I wish I weren't so far from "home."
I guess what I am ultimately saying is that I love where I live, I love my life here, but I really, really miss my family and the area they live in.
If you are reading this in TN, have no fear, we aren't going anywhere...for a while anyway. As I said before, we really do love it here. I wouldn't have taken a job here and we wouldn't have bought a house here if we didn't. I am just feeling a bit homesick.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Uncertain Certainty - The Role of Trust
Everywhere I look it seems I am reminded of what an integral role trust plays in just about every part of our lives. This is certainly true with friends or a significant other but there is also a higher level trust that really effects us. It shapes our perspectives of just about everything - from the organizations we are a part of, to the churches we attend, to the governing bodies we are under.
A good definition of trust that I have found is:
I probably shouldn't have to be reminded about trust, it is basically what I wrote my Master's thesis about. Really, I wrote about how a person's social environment in their workplace effects their perceptions of fairness of their employer, but a major part of it and by far the biggest finding was the role of trust. I found that when employees trusted their coworkers and their supervisor(s), they perceived their employer and working conditions as much more fair and visa versa. Without getting too academic, there is also a fair amount of research linking perceptions of fairness to performance. This leads me to believe that trust effects perceptions of fairness which in turn effects performance. That's huge! Whether or not we trust our coworkers and our boss influences how productive we are? From an employers perspective, there is a big opportunity here.
I am on a team at work to put together a pandemic plan - what do we do if half our workforce can't report to work, do we pay them if they don't come in, do we shut down, do we limit travel, etc. In attempt to get up to speed on all things pandemic I have been reading a book - The Unthinkable, by Amanda Ripley. One of the things Ripley discusses is a general lack of trust from the top down:
In the context of the book about disaster situations, her point is that by not trusting people with the facts and some context, people make mistakes in these types of situations. This got me thinking that trust goes both ways. Not only is it important for employees to trust other employees and their bosses or citizens to trust their government, but its also important for their bosses, their company, and their government to trust them. In fact, this may be the precursor to that upward kind of trust (coworkers for boss, company, etc.).
We all tend to have an "us and them" mentality and I think struggle sometimes to extend trust to "them." Police Officers tend to think of civilians as a little less; the same is true with retail sales associates and customers. What would happen if we made a conscious effort to level with "them" by showing respect and extending trust?
I recently attended a conference where I saw a popular speaker/writer talk about the speed of trust. While his talk and book are decidedly pop-business, he makes a good point. Though we often think of trust as something that moves slowly, when it is present, it speeds things up. He used the example of business deals going through more quickly, but this is also true with other areas. If you trust your coworkers and boss, you are going to be more productive, if you trust your spouse, you won't spend as much time worrying and arguing, and in Ripley's example, if you trust your protector (and they you), you will respond better and more quickly in crisis situations.
What I'm getting at here, is that trust is absolutely essential, and not only in our personal lives as we so often think. Rather it profoundly effects every area in our lives and we would be wise to devote a little thought to the kind of trust that has been extended to us and that we have extended to others, whether individuals or groups.
A good definition of trust that I have found is:
The willingness of a party to be vulnerable to the actions of another party based on the expectation that the other will perform a particular action important to the trustor, irrespective of the ability to monitor or control that other party (Mayer, Davis, and Schoorman, 1995).
I probably shouldn't have to be reminded about trust, it is basically what I wrote my Master's thesis about. Really, I wrote about how a person's social environment in their workplace effects their perceptions of fairness of their employer, but a major part of it and by far the biggest finding was the role of trust. I found that when employees trusted their coworkers and their supervisor(s), they perceived their employer and working conditions as much more fair and visa versa. Without getting too academic, there is also a fair amount of research linking perceptions of fairness to performance. This leads me to believe that trust effects perceptions of fairness which in turn effects performance. That's huge! Whether or not we trust our coworkers and our boss influences how productive we are? From an employers perspective, there is a big opportunity here.
I am on a team at work to put together a pandemic plan - what do we do if half our workforce can't report to work, do we pay them if they don't come in, do we shut down, do we limit travel, etc. In attempt to get up to speed on all things pandemic I have been reading a book - The Unthinkable, by Amanda Ripley. One of the things Ripley discusses is a general lack of trust from the top down:
First and most important, the people in charge of warning us should treat us with respect. It's surprising how rarely warnings explain why you should do something, not just what you should do. Once you start noticing this problem, you'll see it everywhere. In fact, I think that the mistakes the public makes in calculating risk are primarily due to this pervasive lack of trust on behalf of the people charged with protecting us.
In the context of the book about disaster situations, her point is that by not trusting people with the facts and some context, people make mistakes in these types of situations. This got me thinking that trust goes both ways. Not only is it important for employees to trust other employees and their bosses or citizens to trust their government, but its also important for their bosses, their company, and their government to trust them. In fact, this may be the precursor to that upward kind of trust (coworkers for boss, company, etc.).
We all tend to have an "us and them" mentality and I think struggle sometimes to extend trust to "them." Police Officers tend to think of civilians as a little less; the same is true with retail sales associates and customers. What would happen if we made a conscious effort to level with "them" by showing respect and extending trust?
I recently attended a conference where I saw a popular speaker/writer talk about the speed of trust. While his talk and book are decidedly pop-business, he makes a good point. Though we often think of trust as something that moves slowly, when it is present, it speeds things up. He used the example of business deals going through more quickly, but this is also true with other areas. If you trust your coworkers and boss, you are going to be more productive, if you trust your spouse, you won't spend as much time worrying and arguing, and in Ripley's example, if you trust your protector (and they you), you will respond better and more quickly in crisis situations.
What I'm getting at here, is that trust is absolutely essential, and not only in our personal lives as we so often think. Rather it profoundly effects every area in our lives and we would be wise to devote a little thought to the kind of trust that has been extended to us and that we have extended to others, whether individuals or groups.
Sunday, June 7, 2009
New Day, Next Page
Wow! It has been a long time since I have looked at this blog. I was reading back over some of my past posts and realized that I really enjoy writing and that a lot has happened in my life over the past year or two. With that I have learned a lot about myself.
Lately, I have been doing a lot of reflection on my life and thinking about what I want out of it. I guess I have just been coming to the realization that if I don't act on life, it will "happen" to me. So, I need to set boundaries and have an idea of where I want to go. What I am not saying is that I need to have a master plan of every step I will ever take in life. But rather, know what is important to me (and to Bree) and go after those things. The hard part about that is saying no to everyone else.
I saw a Stephen Covey video once that did a great job at illustrating this point. He had a bucket filled about 3/4 with pebbles and then around ten large stones each with a label - family, travel, church, etc. The pebbles represented all of the little things in life, good or bad - appointments, soccer games, church events, etc. He asked a volunteer to choose a certain number of the larger stones that represented things that were important to her - around 6 or 7 - and fit them in the bucket, below the brim. After trying for a couple of minutes she gave up, Stephen stopped her, knowing it was impossible, and changed the rules. He gave her an empty bucket and asked her to do the same thing. Of course, this time it was easy. He then asked her to see how much of the pebbles from the previous bucket she could fit in with the large stones. She poured a little at a time and shook the pebbles down to the bottom, and sure enough she fit all of them.
The message in this illustration is pretty clear - If you try to fit the things you value in on top of life, it isn't going to work. Rather, put the things you value first, and let everything else fill the gaps.
This is so important and something that I have been trying the wrong way and have been working over the past year or two to go back and put the things I value in the bucket first.
I love life and I love learning!
Lately, I have been doing a lot of reflection on my life and thinking about what I want out of it. I guess I have just been coming to the realization that if I don't act on life, it will "happen" to me. So, I need to set boundaries and have an idea of where I want to go. What I am not saying is that I need to have a master plan of every step I will ever take in life. But rather, know what is important to me (and to Bree) and go after those things. The hard part about that is saying no to everyone else.
I saw a Stephen Covey video once that did a great job at illustrating this point. He had a bucket filled about 3/4 with pebbles and then around ten large stones each with a label - family, travel, church, etc. The pebbles represented all of the little things in life, good or bad - appointments, soccer games, church events, etc. He asked a volunteer to choose a certain number of the larger stones that represented things that were important to her - around 6 or 7 - and fit them in the bucket, below the brim. After trying for a couple of minutes she gave up, Stephen stopped her, knowing it was impossible, and changed the rules. He gave her an empty bucket and asked her to do the same thing. Of course, this time it was easy. He then asked her to see how much of the pebbles from the previous bucket she could fit in with the large stones. She poured a little at a time and shook the pebbles down to the bottom, and sure enough she fit all of them.
The message in this illustration is pretty clear - If you try to fit the things you value in on top of life, it isn't going to work. Rather, put the things you value first, and let everything else fill the gaps.
This is so important and something that I have been trying the wrong way and have been working over the past year or two to go back and put the things I value in the bucket first.
I love life and I love learning!
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